Author Topic: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS  (Read 1192 times)

CuriousCharacter

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Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« on: March 19, 2021, 12:41:53 PM »
It has been a long time since I've been on this forum, my friends.

POIS sent me on quite a journey. The harsh contrast between POIS and 15+ years of sex addiction created pressure that needed to be dealt with.

These are the symptoms I was experiencing earlier in this process:
  • Two days of severe depression, brain fog and inability to function for two days after orgasm, beginning about 24 hours after orgasm
  • Chronic depression (often suicidal)
  • Social anxiety
  • Chronic pain and muscular tension
  • Dissociation
  • Emptional/physical Numbness (often unaware of intense physical pain)
  • SI joint dysfunction

I also had difficulty exercising, and for much of the process, had difficulty walking and sitting without making matters worse.

The list of things I've tried to help with this condition are vast:

  • 100+ supplements and herbal remedies
  • Keto, paleo and vegetarian diets
  • Fasting (intermittent and 2-3 day fasts)
  • Self-myofascial release
  • Craniosacral therapy
  • Acupuncture
  • Full body vibration
  • Lessons in the Alexander Technique
  • 22 ayahuasca ceremonies
  • Inipi (sweat lodge) ceremonies
  • Kambo, 5-MeO-DMT, mushrooms, LSD, cannabis
  • Various microdosing regimens (mostly mushrooms, sometimes San Pedro, ayahuasca vine, and very occassionally 5-MeO-DMT and iboga)
  • Use of sacred tobacco (rapeh, mapacho, ambil)
  • Kava, mambe, kratom, valerian, blue lotus...
  • Chiropractic adjustments
  • Pelvic floor physical therapy
  • Rolfing
  • Massage and body work
  • Shamanic energy healing
  • Fire and water ceremonies
  • Float tanks, brainwave entrainment, lots and lots of meditation
  • Working with various coaches and therapists
  • Journaling (sometimes 40+ pages/day)
  • Cutting down on work substantially to free up time for healing
  • Breathwork (Transformational Breath, holotropic breathwork, Wim Hof, various pranayama techniques)
  • Hypnotherapy
  • Shadow work
  • Parts work
  • Inner child work
  • Tantric coaching and sacred sexuality
  • Countless hours of meditation

I spent a small fortune running all these little n=1 experiments, and I am free of POIS. In fact, all my symptoms are gone, except for some (much more mild) pain and tension and SI joint issues, which I can manage quite well with my daily practices. In fact, I now find that a little meditation can fix up my body quite nicely without too much effort.

I feel like, at this point, I understand the nature of POIS. I have come to understand its nature through careful observation.

I feel strongly that POIS is rooted in one fundamental belief structure:
Orgasms are UNSAFE

It can also be reframed this way: Sexuality and sensual pleasure is UNSAFE

One thing I've learned from watching many people with autoimmune issues heal themselves in ayahuasca ceremonies: it is the mind that creates the auto-immune response. And I observe this in myself.

I unconsciously held the belief that orgasms are not safe. I felt that porn and sex addiction was destroying my life, discovered the "NoFap" movement... and came to fear the orgasm. But my sexuality was already founded on negative thoughts, beliefs and emotions. And, coming from a Christian background, the fear of sexuality runs deep. We may not be conscious of it, but we carry the wounds and burdens of our ancestors, until we choose to heal it, and therefore heal the lineage.

In my inner work, I recovered the repressed memory of being sexually tortured at the age of four or younger. I know who did this to me. I think it happened more than once. And I can see clearly how my sexual development was doomed from the beginning by this depraved act. I can also see how abuse in the Catholic church impacted my abuser, leading to deep-seated feelings of powerlessness that led him to act in the way he did. Unfortunately, he was a victim of fate rather than a master of his own destiny, so he has to carry the burden of guilt for what he did.

I chose to not be a victim of fate. Over time, I was able to rewrite my ideas about orgasm, sexuality and sensual pleasure. I was able to recover the innocence and sacredness of sexuality. Now, when I orgasm, I can feel the auto-immune response begin. I feel parts of my body begin to contract and constrict in fear. Old habits die hard. But now, I can relax my mind and body, affirming that what I'm doing is safe, and allowing myself to fully experience pleasure in the body. Much better than my old sexual pattern, in which I was a disembodied vessel, dependent on extreme pornography for stimulation.

I think the Western materialistic mindset of focusing on chemical reactions instead of the mental reality of these conditions is precisely what keeps people locked in a state of suffering. In my humble opinion, we have much to learn from the shamans of old.

Iwillbeatthis

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #1 on: March 19, 2021, 02:03:59 PM »
Congrats on healing! I agree with all of this, did any of the things you listed help you heal in particular or was it mainly just changing the belief structure that cured you?

http://nothingworks.weebly.com/ this blog explains the limbic system involvement in many conditions and how to fix it

https://www.livescience.com/42430-placebo-effect-half-of-drug-efficacy.html - "Placebo Effect May Account for Half of pharmecutical Drug's Efficacy

"In many conditions, placebo effect is a big part of the effect of the drug," said study researcher, Ted Kaptchuk, a professor of medicine at Harvard Medical School. In the new study, 50 percent of the drug's effect could be attributed to the placebo effect, he said

"The more you give a positive message, the more a drug works. In this case, our message was just as important as the pharmacology of the drug," Kaptchuk said." - Mind body connection

I'm glad you focused on the mind and body connection, a lot of people in here don't understand what it actually means and think it just means your symptoms are psychological or that you don't have a physical cause like immune dysfunction - neither of these are true. The mind body connection can have an effect on your immune system and all other illness.

One thing I found helpful is to keeping telling yourself "give me brain fog, give me symptoms" it creates the opposite effect.

"I feel strongly that POIS is rooted in one fundamental belief structure: Orgasms are UNSAFE" - Yes these beliefs cause a dysfunctional limbic system and create symptoms and if you are reading or talking about illness the whole time then your limbic system will continue to think you're in danger and you won't get better - something I need to work on.

« Last Edit: March 19, 2021, 02:09:10 PM by Iwillbeatthis »

Hopeoneday

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #2 on: March 19, 2021, 03:18:07 PM »
Hi CC.
Good news on healing...


Tuvan shaman..
Dr-pois.

CuriousCharacter

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #3 on: March 19, 2021, 04:06:34 PM »
I agree with all of this, did any of the things you listed help you heal in particular or was it mainly just changing the belief structure that cured you?

I think that, at the end of the day, it's all about the belief structure. The beliefs create the perceptions, the perceptions create the thoughts, the thoughts create the emotions, the emotional reactions create the physical/energetic symptoms.

And the key to changing the belief structure is awareness. We can't change it if we're not conscious of it. Awareness of body sensations, awareness of feelings and emotions, awareness of thought processes, awareness of the unconscious shadow elements, awareness of the different archetypal parts of the psyche and their relationships with one another, awareness of the subtle energy body, and awareness of the core beliefs we hold, which dictate the workings of all of the above.

If we catch the unconscious processes that are causing our symptoms, we have power over the condition. The ball is in our court. We can choose to reframe the belief with mantras or affirmations. We can even perform a little at-home fire ceremony, blowing old beliefs/thoughts/emotions into a hibachi stick and burning it in a candle flame, to be transformed into something that serves us going forward. There is great power in intention and ceremony.

It goes a lot deeper honestly, in ways that I am hesitant to share because they conflict so harshly with Western conditioning and the mechanistic worldview that so many people hold. Let's just say that connection with the spirit world has been a major key, if not the major key, to my healing process.

Psychedelics (particularly ayahuasca and 5-MeO-DMT) have been an integral part of my healing process because they facilitate awareness, spiritual connection, and the healing of psychosomatic wounds/burdens ("issues in the tissues") that have kept me stuck in unproductive unconscious patterns (such as POIS). Psychedelics can emulate many months of psychotherapy in less than a day, but they can be ungrounding, destabilizing and challenging to integrate. On the other hand, practices like breathwork, meditation, shadow work, inner child work, prayer, mantras, journaling, drawing, yin yoga... these can all be immensely useful for the same reasons. They require much more time and consistency to yield results, but they are sustainable long-term.

One thing I found helpful is to keeping telling yourself "give me brain fog, give me symptoms" it creates the opposite effect.

I don't think that would work for me. My body tends to give me what I ask for quite quickly these days ;D

My most useful phrases, if I have to choose, would be:
  • I'm sorry
  • Please forgive me
  • Thank you
  • I love you
  • It's okay
  • Relax / soften / let go / give up
  • It's safe
  • I allow
  • And so it is

Combine those power phrases with some second (sacral/sexual) chakra affirmations and you're making some serious mental magic there  :D

Iwillbeatthis

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #4 on: March 20, 2021, 08:41:46 AM »
Yeah I tried micro dosing psilocybin this week and it has a good effect switching on my brain the way it should be working - it cures Neuroinflammotory conditions. I haven't tried for POIS yet though.
« Last Edit: March 20, 2021, 09:00:01 AM by Iwillbeatthis »

Hopeoneday

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #5 on: March 20, 2021, 06:13:10 PM »
By the way, can somebody recomended good shaman? 
Nobody? 
I allways lowed shamans  ;D
Dr-pois.

demografx

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #6 on: March 20, 2021, 06:26:22 PM »
By the way, can somebody recomended good shaman? 
Nobody? 
I allways lowed shamans  ;D

10 years of significant POIS-reduction, treatment consisting of daily (365 days/year) testosterone patches.

TRT must be checked out carefully with your doctor due to fertility, cardiac and other risks.

40+ years of severe 4-days-POIS, married, raised a family, started/ran a business

Hopeoneday

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #7 on: March 20, 2021, 06:39:51 PM »
Ahahah , ;D ;D  i think with this shaman , pois disappears in one treatmant.

I yust now remebered how indians in this movie(by true story)  give
cure for prostate to Anthony Hopkins...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_World%27s_Fastest_Indian
« Last Edit: March 20, 2021, 06:49:33 PM by Hopeoneday »
Dr-pois.

Going less Crazy

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #8 on: March 20, 2021, 09:18:01 PM »
By the way, can somebody recomended good shaman? 
Nobody? 
I allways lowed shamans  ;D

Yes I can recommend a good shaman.

He lives in a van down by the river.
My POIS managed with Diet (@ diet that 100% manages my pois)Believe my POIS stems from inflammation in the gut. O = neuro POIS from inflammation from the gut

Current supps: microdose of zyrtec and gaia liquid olive leaf extract for sleep. Micro astragalus and 1tsp ev olive oil for energy .

CuriousCharacter

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #9 on: March 21, 2021, 07:37:34 PM »
By the way, can somebody recomended good shaman? 
Nobody? 
I allways lowed shamans  ;D

In all seriousness, I can recommend a very good shaman or two.

demografx

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #10 on: March 21, 2021, 08:29:51 PM »

Ahahah , ;D ;D  i think with this shaman , pois disappears in one treatmant.


Two.

But he charges $50,000 per treatment ;D
« Last Edit: March 22, 2021, 12:27:12 AM by demografx »
10 years of significant POIS-reduction, treatment consisting of daily (365 days/year) testosterone patches.

TRT must be checked out carefully with your doctor due to fertility, cardiac and other risks.

40+ years of severe 4-days-POIS, married, raised a family, started/ran a business

demografx

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #11 on: March 21, 2021, 10:41:26 PM »
By the way, can somebody recomended good shaman? 
Nobody? 
I allways lowed shamans  ;D

Yes I can recommend a good shaman.

He lives in a van down by the river.

;D ;D
10 years of significant POIS-reduction, treatment consisting of daily (365 days/year) testosterone patches.

TRT must be checked out carefully with your doctor due to fertility, cardiac and other risks.

40+ years of severe 4-days-POIS, married, raised a family, started/ran a business

Hopeoneday

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #12 on: March 22, 2021, 03:37:39 PM »
Wel guys, i visited this shaman in van down by the river and
my pois geting worse...

Dr-pois.

berlin1984

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #13 on: March 22, 2021, 03:57:19 PM »
Then it was a witch :-)

demografx

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #14 on: March 23, 2021, 07:02:35 PM »
Wel guys, i visited this shaman in van down by the river and
my pois geting worse...


Patience, HOD!

Just keep trying!

Try different shamanic positions!
« Last Edit: March 23, 2021, 07:05:55 PM by demografx »
10 years of significant POIS-reduction, treatment consisting of daily (365 days/year) testosterone patches.

TRT must be checked out carefully with your doctor due to fertility, cardiac and other risks.

40+ years of severe 4-days-POIS, married, raised a family, started/ran a business

Going less Crazy

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Re: Update on my healing journey, and my theory of POIS
« Reply #15 on: March 24, 2021, 04:25:28 PM »
Wel guys, i visited this shaman in van down by the river and
my pois geting worse...


Try different shamanic positions!

This is especially important
My POIS managed with Diet (@ diet that 100% manages my pois)Believe my POIS stems from inflammation in the gut. O = neuro POIS from inflammation from the gut

Current supps: microdose of zyrtec and gaia liquid olive leaf extract for sleep. Micro astragalus and 1tsp ev olive oil for energy .