Hi to everyone,
First of all I want to apology for my bad english, it's not my first language so probably there will be a lot of errors.
I'm 22 years old, and I think I've had pois for the last 6-7 years. I remember that during high schools I had a lot of days a sensation of brain fog, then I also started to have headaches,and a lot of social anxiety. At first I wasn't able to understand that all these phenomena were linked but more or less 3y ago, I started noticing that all this thing worsened when I had an emission. At that time I used to have one or two emission per week, so probably that's why I didn't notice earlier, I had it almost all time. After that, I noticed that by abstaining I felt better, and so I understood what was the cause.
In these three years my symptoms have worsened. Before I had brain fog,headaches,flu-like symptoms and anxiety but these things only lasted for some days, instead in these years I developed a lot of other symptoms and they also last longer(even tough my headaches became milder). So the complete list of symptoms I have now after every emission are these:
Physical symptoms:
-muscular tiredness(not very much, but still when doing sport I get tired more easily),stiff shoulders,slower reflexes and also a bit of balance problems
-flu-like symptoms(I have also allergies but every time after O they get worse)
-digestion problems
Psychological symptoms:
-social anxiety( It become difficult to be around others, you feel like everyone doesn't want you to be around and is judging you for every word you say or thing you do)
-rage( I don't know there are also things like noise which can even worsen this and in that case it become difficult to control my angriness)
-depression(everything seems to become really difficult and pointless,even getting up from bed)
Cognitive symptoms:
-Very strong brain fog, It takes time to understand what's happening around me
-A sense of unreality
-It becomes very hard to memorize things(especially things I hear, more easy if I'm reading them)
-Unability to focus on something
The symptoms starts to appear some minutes after the emission; usually the pyschological and physical symptoms disappear gradually in 3-4 days. As for the cognitive ones the disappeare really slowly, normally after a week I really start to recover and day by day I feel better, but they never really go away. One time I saw that after three weeks they had completly vanished but normally I'm not able to reach the three weeks. I know it seems ridiculus but even though I know it's better for me to abstain I usually only last 1week - two weeks. There was a time in which I managed to reach three months, but I continued to have NE (which give me symptoms which are a bit less severe but since they happened frequently the effects summed up and so I felt like shit in that period). After that I hadn't have the willstrenght to try again, this disease had weakened my willpower I think, all seems so pointless that now it becam really difficult to event try. Now I'm doing seriously another try(the problem also the other times I tought that I could resist LOL
) but I'm at the third NE in five days so I'm not doing very well.My problem is also that also arousal give me light pois(but again in that case the sum of effect is not so light)
I discovered the last year that it exist a disease which seems to match my symptoms, and I'm onestly glad, because the situation seemed so strange I didn't know what to think.The problem is that for now I can't go to a doctor for this, and even If I could from what I read online there aren't test which can prove this disease, so probably it would be pointless, so for now I just will try to abstain and find a way to survive this.
Since I'm a new member there are things that I would like to ask to people which had it for a longer time, especially this:since in my case it's worsened in these years I wanted to ask if it's something normal and it will continue to get worse or if maybe it will just stay this way.
