Hey Guys,
It seems like a lot of people on here struggle with porn or sex addiction, and this struggle really intensifies their disease because they're in a permanent state of brainfog. I used to be one of these people. I used to be addicted to porn/sex and was able to cure it with a pretty serious meditation regimen. (And when I say addicted i'm not joking: I used to have sexsomnia and would give it to the gf 3 times a day!) As a slightly younger man, years and years of pornography consumption made it such that sex would float in and out of my mind constantly. This is why meditation was perfect: it's primary goal is to give you an awareness of your thoughts and thereby allow you to control them.
It took a good deal of work and A LOT of meditating (2 or 3 times a day for about 3-4 months) but I gradually became aware of how suffused with smut my thoughts were and was able to gain control of my brain and redirect it away from things leading to masturbation. And once I broke the addiction, I was able to stop meditating without fearing I'd relapse into the same thought patterns. (I'm even able to watch porn now, once or twice a week, without threat of overindulgence.) Anyone struggling with an addiction to porn/sex should really try it out! And, for what it's worth, it has the added bonus of improving concentration and reducing anxiety -- each of which POISers are known to struggle with.
I'd recommend anyone interested in starting a meditation regimen begin going to a class 1 (or 2) days a week. When you're a beginner classes are a great and important way to force yourself to meditate, as it's an absolutely arduous process when you first start out. They're also a good way to be taught how to properly meditate and learn a few exercises. (The classes I attended were of the Kadampa school but I don't think it much matters what school your instructor follows. Just make sure you're doing breathing meditations, rather than chanting or pacing, etc.)
Although I strongly recommend you begin meditating with a class, here are a few tips on meditating for you to try at home:
-Sit in a quiet (and non-distracting) space, in a chair that isn't too comfy and allows you to sit upright. (We don't want the chair to be too comfy because the goal of meditation is facilitating awareness and wakefulness of the mind; not drowsiness.) Make sure the space isn't so bright that it's bothersome but also isn't so dimly lit that you'll become sleepy.
-Close your eyes either fully or 4/5ths of the way. Breathe in deeply through your nose and feel the air come into and out of your nose & lungs.
-As you attempt to focus on your breathing, thoughts will float in and out of your head. As you notice thoughts emerging, calmly make yourself aware of them (and what your brain is doing) and then peacefully cast them aside. (I always found it helpful to think to myself "see your thoughts" every time a stray thought would enter my mind.) Do not follow them or allow them to distract you. (A helpful image here -- and one that you're free to conjure up while meditating -- is that your mind is a clear vast blue sky that clouds float into and out of. You can allow them to occasionally float on by -- provided they don't stay -- but if too many of them stick around and accumulate, your sky/mind will become dark and turbulent.)
-When you first start meditating, try to go for 10 - 15 minutes once or twice a week (preferably with your class), and try to go twice a day for about 5 minutes each time. After you've been doing this for somewhere between one and three weeks, you mind will become less resistant to the idea of pacifying itself and allow you to go longer. Initially, getting to 10 minutes will be something of a fight EVERY time, but once you get there you'll really feel your mind quiet down and will begin to see major dividends from your meditation. You should be able to meditate for 10 minutes twice a day by about your third week. Once you're comfortable going for 10 minutes, try (occasionally or regularly) going for 15 or 20.
